Reflections on 2014

I know it’s been a long time since I posted anything to my blog. I’ve spent most of 2014 with my head down and regrouping after the demise of the 4-corner relationship Husband Darling and I were in. Becoming a hermit was quite appealing for a time, but I also knew that what I truly needed was to withdraw from my very active social life to work on myself again. I had ignored my spiritual self for far too long. I realized I had taken a wrong turn on my life path and found myself lost. I asked the Universe for help with my spirituality and went back to where I knew I was happy–healing others. So I got my license and resume in order.

I applied at the place where I had been receiving massage for the past few years. The clinic administrator had already put forth a soft offer for me to work for her if other places didn’t work out for me. The day I dropped off my resume, I had an impromptu interview with the CA and the regional manager who happened to be in the clinic that day. I also did my practical (giving massage) to the RM then. I gave them my availability and was told to come back in three days for training. I started the following week and have been at that clinic for nearly a year now. I’ve amassed a loyal following in a very short time. By the time mid-September hit, not only was the rest of the month booked but so was the entire month of October! Most of my clients are regulars. Admittedly I have a few favorites, including a pregnant woman who is having her first child after many years of her and her husband trying to get pregnant. Oh! How I love working with expecting mothers! There is nothing more beautiful in my eyes than a woman pregnant with child.

Healing others has been my calling for well over a decade now. Being able to help others heal their bodies is gratifying and humbling. There are days when I’d rather be home because I am tired or want to spend more time with Husband Darling, but the pull of my clients motivates me to go. I am one of the lucky few who absolutely loves their job. The human body is endlessly fascinating, and I simply don’t get bored (unless someone just wants to be petted for their entire session). The unexpected bonus from working my very physical job is that I’ve lost inches throughout the trunk of my body.

Accepting my body has been a lifetime achievement. Once I had Kidlet my modesty button was pretty much removed. Hard to feel embarrassed when several people are looking and poking at my vagina before, during, and after labor. One of the things I taught my massage students is the sooner and more completely you can feel comfortable in your own skin, the better therapist you will be. Clients will be able to tell if you have body issues. Touch does not lie. If you feel uncomfortable, so will they. Moving regularly for hours at a time sculpted my body. When my bestie got engaged as asked me to be one of her matrons of honor, I set out to find a dress. I found something I liked online and went to the brick and mortar store to try it on. I knew I had lost weight/inches but not how much. I was amazed to discover I had dropped two dress sizes! I still get asked what I did to lose weight. I’ll even give all here my secret to successful weight loss:

  •  Belief that my job was good exercise so I should lose weight/inches.
  • Embracing a positive mental attitude.

That’s it. I really haven’t changed too much else in my life. I’ve been slowly changing over the years eating habits and healthier food choices. Working a physical job has helped me rebuild my strength and endurance. The pain I’ve been living with for years has lessened. More than anything else I’ve done, I fully believe that it’s my change of attitude that’s done the most good. I decide whether or not I’m going to have a good day. More often than not I wake up on the Awesome Side of the bed. When others ask me how I’m doing, my answer is almost always positive in some way. I stopped focusing so much on the bad and started focusing more on the good. I’m amused by the typical response of silence as they take that in or wait for the “bad news” that rarely comes. I’ve noticed that more and more of those who are closer to me have started focusing on what’s positive in their lives as well. Our conversations are usually full of happy news or troubleshooting problems instead of bitching about what’s wrong in our lives. I’m loving this trend! I’ve continued being positive even through social media. When I find myself answering someone’s post with anger or resentment, I scrap the whole thing unless I can find a positive, non-confrontational way to respond.

The nifty thing about social media is I’ve been able to meet and friend many wonderful people over the years. As I’ve told Husband Darling some of my Heart Family are people I simply haven’t met in person yet. In early November I picked up a few new followers on Twitter. One person in particular I was interacting with regularly almost from the start. He and his wife were somewhat new to polyamory and had been coming to meetups here in the Portland area for awhile now. My internet 6th sense kicked in and told me these were Good People. I offered to meet with them on a Friday after work, and we did. I immediately liked both of them and wondered if they’d be open to hugs, because as some of you know I’m a very huggy person. Lucky for me I didn’t even have to ask because Q’ouarin (the husband) asked me first. He hugs the way I love–full body and with enthusiasm.

From there forward things moved fast between us. We had our first date November 28th. Uty (the wife) and Q spent the long weekend over Christmas with us. Yes, Scrooge McKitten got over the bah! humbug! of the holidays and actually got into the Yule spirit. And remember when I stated earlier that I had asked the Universe for spiritual guidance? Yeah, that came in the form of Q’ouarin as well. He is a unicorn otherkin (more on this in a future post) and was looking for someone like me himself. The Universe answered us both, and boy! has it been a wild ride so far!

My life has changed and is changing rapidly for the better in just a few short weeks. I’m back on my chosen path of being Love and Light and expect I likely won’t recognize the person I am now in a year. I’m planning to write more, do more, and be more in the next year. I’m looking forward to all the exciting changes 2015 promises to bring.



I’m finding myself in a strange place of wanting to write (and often do in other media), but not really having the time and sometimes energy to do so since I’ve been busy living my life. I’m working again (WOOHOO!!), and my days off are often spent with Husband Darling making sure we are connecting on a regular basis or doing mundane but essential tasks that need to be addressed. The best part of it all is I’m feeling really good emotionally and physically, better than I have in far too long. To paraphrase Husband Darling from one of our recent heart-to-heart conversations, I’m closer to the Me I was when he and I first met–vivacious, fun, and bouncy.

I’ve started a few posts that get more into the whys and wherefores and will be posting as I get them completed. In the meantime I want to share this video that a long-time friend of mine posted on FB a short while ago. I think I found my new favorite musical group. Enjoy, my freaky darlings!

Postcards from the Edge

Life has been full of changes this summer. With everything happening I haven’t taken much opportunity to write beyond in my private journal. Some of the changes I will be writing about and sharing in the weeks and months ahead; some will stay in my private journal as a personal reminder of what I’ve been able to overcome during the tumultuous recent months. For now I leave you all with this little gem that has recently come into my awareness. Some of these lessons were learned recently and hard-won. The Universe smacked me upside the head with the rest to make certain I remembered the lesson.


10 Happy Thoughts, 7-27-2013

1. Kitty snuggles.
2. Husband snuggles.
3. Elixir of Life.
4. New Anita Blake novel.
5. Attending the wedding of friends.
6. Watching Boo get her social butterfly on.
7. Husband Darling made a new friend.
8. Geeking out over a video game with a fellow gamer.
9. Boo having a sleepover with a friend.
10. Chocolate chip cookie dough.
11. Backyard camping.
12. Making plans for hanging out with friends.
13. Driving through Husband Darling’s old neighborhood.
14. Getting my chocolate fix.
15. Chubby bunny.

Yeah, I totally forgot about posting yesterday’s list until this morning. That’s what happens when I get to read a long-anticipated novel by one of my favorite authors. I made up for it a bit by posting a few extra tonight.

10 Happy Thoughts, 7-25-2013

1. Kitteh snuggles.
2. Walking and talking with my Boo.
3. A murder of crows.
4. Killer deal on chicken boobies.
5. Asian meatballs and spicy mayo.
6. Watching (and snarking) True Blood with friends.
7. Big E.
8. Fezzik.
9. CHOCOLATE CAKE!! (The cake is NOT a lie!)
10. Crawl into my lap hugs from a pretty girl.

This evening I went to my SweetBee’s house for nibbles, True Blood viewing, and chocolate cake. I had a really great time hanging out with other friends that I just don’t get to see very often. Plus receiving enthusiastic hugs from the pretty girl I’ve been crushing on…. *sigh* Yeah, Life has definitely taken an upswing lately. I think focusing on the positive has made a huge difference.

PS–What made you smile today? Love to see your happy thoughts!

10 Happy Thoughts, 7-24-2013

1. Husband snuggles before he had to get up for work.
2. Kitty snuggles.
3. Walking with Boo and Mom.
4. Meeting a “new” neighbor.
5. Catching up with Mom.
6. Making plans with a friend.
7. Elk burger! Om nom nom!!
8. Making Boo giggle ’til it hurts.
9. Cute toddler with his grandparents.
10. Beautiful summer evening.

Walking three miles in about an hour is great progress for me. I was able to keep a good pace with both Kidlet and Mom. I’m fast discovering that now that my body is doing so much better, it gets very unhappy with me if I have poor body mechanics. Even at the end of this evening as tired as I am, my posture was damn good. Slouching hurts. My back has been frequently reminding me for the past week or so of that. Tomorrow I’m making sure Boo and I get an earlier start in the cooler part of the morning for our walk. The heat wasn’t horrid today, but with one of my meds making me photosensitive I don’t want to risk sunburn.

PS–What brought a smile to your face today? Please share in a comment. 😀